Tuesday, August 20, 2019
Meaney's Irreverent Rants

Meaney’s irreverent rants for the sick and tired

Another one bites the dust. The Kiss of Trump has struck Sean “Spicey” Spicer. It was inevitable. Anyone and everyone who comes in contact with the Boss of BS will be imprisoned, financially ruined, exiled in disgrace, mocked, run out of town, or stricken with an STD. It can’t be otherwise.

Now, Spicey—having been tossed on an ash heap of ridicule—has been replaced with something new, and it’s a fairly clever maneuver. Up till now, almost everyone walking in or out of the White House has been named Boris or Natasha or Ivan, and it’s brought grief to El Lardo. “Russia, Russia, Russia,” he tweets again and again. So, where to look for new cucks to inhabit the disintegrating White House?

It has to be someone Trump knows and trusts. Can’t be Russia. Can’t be normal human beings. Maybe the Mafia? Enter Anthony “the Mooch” Scaramucci. Here’s what we know….

Harvard educated (until someone checks the origin of the diploma, I guess), former Goldman Sachs, and rich hedge-fund guy who sold his company to a Chinese conglomerate (don’t we all?). Everybody’s a hedge-fund guy. Am I the only person not connected to a hedge fund? What the hell is a hedge fund? Oh yeah, he’s also a former contributor to FOX News. And has really greased-up hair.

The Mooch used to be concerned about climate change. Now, he agrees that it’s a hoax. He said of Trump, “You’re an inherited-money dude from Queens County.” Also said, “I don’t like the way he talks about women. He’s got a big mouth.” And, “He’s a hack…anti-American.”

Well, that’s all over. At his introduction yesterday, the Mooch said he loved Trump about a dozen times. He said the president is a winner. Said, “We’re going to do a lot of winning.”
When asked about the fact that the president lies incessantly, the Mooch replied, “If the president says it…my guess is there’s probably some level of truth to that.”

What I’m wondering about is the forgotten Trump voter. You know, the coal miners? The evangelical home schooler on Medicaid? Were they consulted? The haters of the elite? Does a Harvard-educated, Goldman Sachs, hedge-fund billionaire drain the swamp fast enough for them?

I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.  – Groucho Marx

People magazine tells us that Donnie D-Bag, Jr., “Just wants these four years to get over with.” Hmm. I’d say, “Get in line, Junior.” There’s about seven billion people on planet earth who’ve been dreaming about that for six months now.

Junior says he can’t “do any deals” (what is with all this deal making?) because he’s under so much scrutiny. Anyone who’s seen prison movies knows all kinds of deal-making opportunities lie ahead in Junior’s future. Like a carton of cigarettes in exchange for protection from prisoners who are as horrified by the American Psycho guy as the rest of humanity. Or, maybe a bottle of hair grease (TrumpHair Sludge, made in Bangladesh) for a cushy job in the laundry. Fear not, Donnie Boy, there’s deals to be made in your future.

Don the Dope and Chinless Mitch said they would simply repeal Obamacare after their loser of a bill failed spectacularly. Within an hour, that failed, too. Remember the dope saying, “We’re going to win so much, you’re going to get sick of winning?” Yo, Trumpscum! Ya’ll sick yet?

There’s something bad wrong with Republicans. Most think Russia is one of our best allies. Fifty-eight percent think that higher education has an adverse impact on the nation. Eighty-five percent think the media (you know, that 1st Amendment thingy) is a negative for the country. They don’t believe in climate change. They think FOX News is a news channel. And they believe that President Lardass gives a damn what happens to them.

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.  – Albert Einstein